I'm not really sure how this happens. I still feel like this 18 year old kid who just graduated from high school without a clue about....well anything! I know that's not true, but makes things so much easier. When you are young, you can't wait to grow up. As a matter of fact, I think a good portion of your childhood is spent looking at people older than you and thinking, I can't wait to be old enough to do that.
It's like when my youngest is in the bathroom and I'm shaving. He acts like he is lathering up, picks up his tooth brush and pretends like its a razor and makes the same motions over his face that I do. There's a part of me that is absolutely glowing inside saying, "That's my boy!", but then there's another side that wants to say, "Shaving sucks! I never really have time to do it and after you've done it three or four....ah....hundred times, you wish there was some weird male facial hair baldness that would set in!" Of course not, only on my head.
I could think of countless examples of things I couldn't wait to do, that I now wish I never had to do. So, comes the responsibility of getting older where at times you wish that you could get younger. When you turn 18 or thereabouts, you realize that YOUR LIFE is going to begin. Up until this point, it's really your parents lives that you've been a part of. You've got the stench of irresponsibility all over you and you don't care because in your mind, nobody else matters, but ME!
So, you set your life on cruise control for a while, you're just coasting. There are bumps in the road, some larger than others, but in the end those bumps are the greatest stories that you will tell (and it's amazing how over the years they get to be more unbelievable). Eventually though, something happens. Someone, for whatever reason, decides that you are responsible. Unfortunately, they don't come right out and say it (because than you could say NO and get back to cruising). Instead, they trick you and feed the responsibility Kool-Aid to you a little at a time, like from a shot glass.
The responsibility Kool-Aid (RKA) is more than likely given to you by one of three people: parents, cute girls or you're boss.
Parents generally try to get you to drink the RKA when they are tired of you mooching all of their stuff and they want you to move out! As a parent, when your children have reached a certain age, preferably between 20-24, they want you to move to somewhere else! Hell, it could be next door so long as it's not in your house. But, parents always screw up the RKA formula! They always dilute it with too much water and there's really no flavor and your back to square one.
Cute girls have the best RKA and it's potent. I think that instead of adding sugar to the RKA, they add crack. Once you've done a few shots, you're ready to move up the to the 32 ounce glass. You can't get enough! Next thing you know, you're an RKA addict and in hopes of securing the RKA, you get married! Now the RKA is the same diluted RKA that your parents were giving you. Damn cute girl RKA!
The last is the boss RKA. This RKA is probably like the office coffee (I'm not 100% sure because I don't drink coffee). Depending on who's making it will determine whether or not you decide to drink it. Some boss RKA is really good. It's given to you in doses that you can handle and if done correctly, you could work up to the espresso version of the boss RKA. Eventually with time you could one day be making the boss RKA. But, as most of us know, most boss RKA is made with a whole lot of BS. Sometimes, like the coffee, it's good, but most of the time you wouldn't give the boss RKA he's serving to your worst enemy.
Anyway, the point is that over time that "stench of irresponsibility" turns into the stench of responsibility and you are no longer in it for just YOU! At some point others become involved and what used to be a lot of meaningless decisions start to really mean something. Congratulations, you've been poisoned by the RKA!
So, here I am at another birthday, waiting for the stench to start to smell like roses. I imagine that won't start to happen until I'm almost dead. But for now, I'll just keep on doing what I've been doing and take my dose of RKA each day!
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